Week 5.3
Tyler Clementi---Cyberbullying Trial Begins Today
A few years ago, a college student, Tyler Clementi jumped to his death from the George Washington Bridge after videos were taken of his romantic encounter with another young man. His roommate used a web cam to capture these videos and share them with others. The trial is to begin today and it will be an interesting case to follow and share with others. This truly shows how mean-spirited behavior or even a "joke" can be unbelievable harmful to others' self-esteem or self-worth. Technolgy plays a huge role in this story because a decision to tape this incident was made and then delivered to others within minutes.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_B-hVWQnjjM
http://abcnews.go.com/US/tyler-clementi-bullying-trial-begins-today/story?id=15752236
Over the past few years, there have been far too many stories of young people who have been "bullied" due to their sexual orientation and even some who have taken their lives because of it. Human decency and dignity have to be taught to our children and in some cases our students. We need to learn from stories like Tyler's and make sure that people are paying attention to what IS happening in our schools and communites.
When is bullying a hate crime? Read this article at http://www.educationworld.com/a_curr/when_is_bullying_a_hate_crime.shtml.
As a teacher, confidentality and feeling safe is so important for your students. This resource will help you decipher when and what to say if a student comes to you and shares personal information about their sexual orientation.
http://www.allyaction.org/s/341/images/editor_documents/StudentConfidentiality.pdf
A great site with lesson plans for discussing Online Hate with your students.
http://www.media-awareness.ca/english/resources/educational/online_hate.cfm
Recommended Educator Practices when a Student "Comes Out"
http://www.guardian.co.uk/education/2011/dec/06/teaching-digital-literacy
The It Gets Better Project was created to show young LGBT people the levels of happiness, potential, and positivity their lives will reach – if they can just get through their teen years. http://www.itgetsbetter.org/
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_B-hVWQnjjM
http://abcnews.go.com/US/tyler-clementi-bullying-trial-begins-today/story?id=15752236
Over the past few years, there have been far too many stories of young people who have been "bullied" due to their sexual orientation and even some who have taken their lives because of it. Human decency and dignity have to be taught to our children and in some cases our students. We need to learn from stories like Tyler's and make sure that people are paying attention to what IS happening in our schools and communites.
When is bullying a hate crime? Read this article at http://www.educationworld.com/a_curr/when_is_bullying_a_hate_crime.shtml.
As a teacher, confidentality and feeling safe is so important for your students. This resource will help you decipher when and what to say if a student comes to you and shares personal information about their sexual orientation.
http://www.allyaction.org/s/341/images/editor_documents/StudentConfidentiality.pdf
A great site with lesson plans for discussing Online Hate with your students.
http://www.media-awareness.ca/english/resources/educational/online_hate.cfm
Recommended Educator Practices when a Student "Comes Out"
http://www.guardian.co.uk/education/2011/dec/06/teaching-digital-literacy
The It Gets Better Project was created to show young LGBT people the levels of happiness, potential, and positivity their lives will reach – if they can just get through their teen years. http://www.itgetsbetter.org/
After reading the first article, bad memories came back to me. I loved the last line in the article, "They do not need a mandatory free week out of school, but rather, mandatory couseling." YES! I read in the article that bullies were once bullied. That may be true. That is where counseling comes into play. It does not make it right nor should the cycle be allowed to continue.
ReplyDeleteI have been to Australia twice. My dad's two brothers live there. I have a huge family down there from my Father's side of the family. I foud them to be more bullies than we are here.
Also, I agree that "hate crimes" are covered in a cloke of "bullying". Most bullying attacks a person's weight, gender, nationality, or sexual orientation. I believe that day has come that bullying needs to be handled by the police as "hate crimes." If not the student, then the parens/guardians who are asleep at the wheel or use the phrase, "kids will be kids." My answer is 'NO" to that. Evil thrives when good people do nothing!
Mike Hatzikostantis
Mike, you hit the nail on the head with your last sentence there. Apathy allows bullies to continue their wrongdoing. Well said!
Delete-MCC
I agree Mike and often talk to my students who think that it is "fun" to watch a fight break out at school. I am sickened by that thought that they think that it is fun and we often discuss what is going through their head when they make that comment or why they feel that people need to resort to physical or emotional violence.
DeleteIf more people stood up for one another instead of watching or ignoring, the world would be a nicer place.
Tina
I was on of the students that watched when a fight broke out. Not cause I wanted to but becasue everyone I knew was. it was scary to see punches,, kicks and blood. i can remeber turning away. I didnt think of standing up against it. I would have been next.
DeleteBunker
Just watching and reading all these clips it is very upsetting. When is it going to end? Will it ever? I really enjoyed the article about the incident in Australia. There were many good points made.
ReplyDeleteI have to agree that most the time bullies are popular, they normally have group of people who back them up. I also agree that in high school students do know and should be responsible for their actions. Students know exactly why they are being mean, they want the attention. This brings me to the other part of the article that I also agree with. Bullies want the attention. So either step in or walk away, do not give them the satisfaction of a crowd watching and cheering on. That is exactly what bullies want.
The final line of the article reads “they don’t need mandatory suspension, a free week off school—what they need is mandatory counseling.”
I do believe consequences in these circumstances should be different, yes the students are suspended and some students may get things taken away at home or other repercussions. These students should be working with someone every day and they should be doing something productive and not sitting at home doing who knows what! Most parents are at work so now the student has full reign of the house all day doing whatever they want. Sounds like an enjoyable punishment to me!
-Danielle
Danielle, you make some valid points. One question I have, however, is that bullies know exactly why they are being mean. I think that some of our students' actions, words, and mannerisms have been engrained through environmental osmosis. The effect of what our students see and interact with on a regular basis creates a version of provisional normalcy which hinders their intrinsic development. I have some students who bully but are not able to realize it. I am not, in any shape or form, condoning the wrongness of the behaviors but I wonder how to modify their reflection process to realize the consistency of their inappropriateness.
Delete-MCC
What a great question, Michael! In some cases, I think it's necessary to explicitly teach and model for our students how to appropriately engage with one another. Students (and adults too...) mimic what they see in their environment, whether that be at home or through the media. I know that in the past West Hartford Public Schools has utilized the "Second Step" program to teach elementary students about pro-social behavior. Not sure how effective it is, though...
DeleteThe article and news clip about Tyler are definitely hard to take. This brings to light many issues that are hardly ever considered, such as the definition of bullying, privacy, hate crimes, etc. I do not recall ever learning about hate crimes unless I heard about them in the news. Likewise, so much rides of the notion of privacy; when is one considered in violation of another's privacy rights? As educators, what is our role in privacy and confidentiality, particularly if bullying might be involved? And as for bullying, does it always have to be the result of negative intentions? Or can bullying sometimes take the form of a well-intended joke gone bad? The resources above really help me answer some of these questions, particularly as my role as an educator. I think the term 'iCitizen' can also be further explored in this context, as citizens, we all have rights and laws we need to follow, and a responsibility to interact civilly and respectfully with others, whether on or offline.
ReplyDelete-Chelsea
Chelsea,
DeleteI agree that there are some gray areas when trying to define the word "bully." I'm sure that in many instances, a joke or a prank is taken just a bit too far, and in the most severe cases leads the ones being bullied to suicide. Even Whoopi Goldberg said this during that session of The View, that she doubts the two students on trial for Tyler Clementi's murder ever thought that his suicide would result from what they did to him. Was what they did wrong and cruel? Yes! But did they ever think this would result? Probably not. We definitely have to put a stop to all this bullying because even when kids think they're joking around, they really DONT KNOW how their words or actions are affecting someone else. There are kids, and people, who silence their feelings and we may never really know what they're thinking. We must treat EVERYONE with the respect they deserve. Just like Ellen said, life is hard enough without someone attacking you. We should be kind to one another always.
Chelsea,
DeleteOne of the teachers that I used to work with always questioned a "well-intentioned joke". If it hurts someone else is it a joke? I think the empathy piece really needs to be taught. If others would put themselves into other people's shoes and think twice about how they would feel if they were in the same situation maybe it would stop some of the behaviors.
Tina
A classroom rule we have in our department is:
DeleteIs it true - is what you are about to say the truth. Did you get your information straight from the source or did someone else tell you.
Is it necessary - does it need to be told to better a situation or someone's life
If so, is what you are about to say kind - are you sharing something that is kind and others can better themselves from it.
This has help with so many conversations and discussions in our classrooms. And it also makes students think twice before they say something and helps them to realize, he maybe I don't know all the facts yet so I should not say anything. Alot of times we all think when we hear something from someone close to us, it is the truth. And we can all get caught up in it. Stoping and thinking about these rules helps to keep us in check as to what we are saying. Thanks for sharing.
Many kids don't know the extent that their jokes, or actions will have on others. I want to believe that kids purposely don't set out to hurt others in a way to drive them to committe suicide or murders.
DeleteKids just want to be funny and at times it at someone elses expense.
Bunker
I was looking around on the itgetsbetter website and I watched a few of the videos. I think this website is absolutely fantastic. I have heard of it before but I have never visited it or I didn’t really know what it was all about. The first time I heard about it was last semester in class when we had a public speaker come in and talk about bullying. He actually showed the class his video.
ReplyDeleteAs I was looking at some of the different videos I realized that there were so many different kinds of videos posted. All kinds of celebrities posted videos talking about bullying and stopping the hate. There were also people of all ages posting videos. I watched one in particular where a college student called his dad and told him he was gay over the phone. I could tell how nervous he was and I actually became nervous for him. I was glad to see that his dad told him he was going to love him no matter what. The mood of the video changed once this person told him dad and his dad reassured him several times that this was not going to change their relationship in anyway.
Some of the other videos I watched were the ones from the celebrities. I realized that there were so many different people posting videos. There was also a search button so you could search different criteria. If someone was feeling down they could go to this site and perhaps find their favorite celeb and hear some reassuring words from them.
Melissa R
I had never explored the ItGetsBetter website prior, but I can only imagine how powerful it must be for adolescents to hear encouraging words from their peers who have struggled with, and ultimately overcome, similar challenges.
DeleteMelissa,
DeleteThis website really caught my eye as well. I had never heard of the video, but I thought the message they were sending is great for any person who is having a hard time. I loved that it included all types of people, but gave such positive messages! Life does get better! Sometimes, when we are all in a bad place, it's hard to remember that tomorrow is a different day with a different opportunity. This website helps instill this message within children!
I think every child has a desire to be popular. Unfortunately, I believe that many children believe bullying classmates will prove their "coolness". Are bullies mean and evil on the inside who do not care about how they are making their victim feel? I don't think these children are bad. I bet if you interviewed people who were considered bullies in school, they would regret their actions. School age children do not have fully developed moral compasses and I think there is still an element of egocentrism involved. If school aged children have good sound judgement, why do we make them wait until they are eighteen to make legal decisions? Some bullies may be bullies because they were bullied, and some bullies may become bullies because they are so scared of being bullied themselves. Each case of bullying is unique so we can't generalize the reason for bullying. Maybe we need to start treating some bullies as adults to send a message. If a bully causes the victim to harm themselves, they should be held accountable. I know when I was in school, teachers and administration never talked about bullying. We need to be more open and educated on bullying. Raising awareness will help build compassion in our students and hopefully begin to decrease bullying.
ReplyDeleteI completely agree with you. I see it in the middle school I work at every day. Everyone wants to be popular and have all the right friends. I haven’t actually seen bullying myself in the classrooms which unfortunately surprises me. But, when I was younger there were two bullies in my elementary school. One was one of the "popular" girls who hated on everyone, even her friends. She thought she was so cool and she basically did whatever she had to do to stay with these people. But, the rest of the "popular" girls were not mean like her at all. The other was a boy who had no friends; he didn’t have friends because he treated everyone poorly. He would pick on everyone and do things to embarrass people on a daily bases. He pulled the chair out from me one and I fell to the floor. That was the only thing I can remember about him but I know now they both have not gotten anywhere in life which is actually upsetting. But, like you said the teachers never addressed this and no one ever told on these two bullies. I bet now things would be a lot different, well I can only hope so.
DeleteMelissa R.
I agree with both of you! I think we can all remember who the bullies were in our school and how they made us feel. I also believe that word bully was never thrown around like it is now. I wish a teacher would have caught a mean behavior and pointed it out to the person who was acting in a mean fashion. That's why I think this generation is trying to stay on top of these behaviors in helping students become the "best" citizens they can be.
DeleteHowever, something that we can't forget, is we don't know what goes on when these kids go home. Many kids come to school to vent or get away from the life they have. We all want school to be a "safe" place where all children feel like they are an important part of the community.
I wish there was an "easy" button to press on this issue. When you hear about all these suicide cases happening as a result to bullying, it really upsets me that someone doesn't think their life is worth living. I wish I could truthfully press that button and make all the pain in these teens go away.
One thing that I do know is that I can help make a difference by helping my students day in a day out and making my classroom atmosphere as positive as can be! I will try to instill this "citizenship" within them as best as I can in hopes that they will apply these rules to their own lives.
I must say that I am appalled at the epidemic of bullying. Bullying has been an existent and visible concern for centuries created by the divide between have's and have-not's (Byzantine Empire). Moreover, we as teachers must fight this battle both outnumbered and outgunned. The articles bring to light the global nature of the epidemic. Without a combined effort bullying will continue to spread like wildfire.
ReplyDeleteAnother point that I really found interesting (reading between the lines) is the enormous amount of pressure by the media. Interestingly, the media is both weapon and ally. I honestly believe that, for the sake of a news story, some situations and contexts are either exaggerated or falsified in some form of another. If the war is to be won on bullying, then the battle strategy must be effective and not just a blind jab.
-MCC
Nicely said, Michael! Teachers need support...we can't tackle this problem alone. At times, we blame teachers for not doing enough, yet without adequate support from administration/ families, bullying becomes an almost insurmountable obstacle.
DeleteI agree, not only do teachers need to be supported, they may not know how to intervene. Just like teachers need training in academincs, new policies, programs, etc. They need to be trained on effective interventions for bullying in the school.
DeleteBunker
I definitely have to say how much I admire Lady Gaga. Some may say she's quite different, but she embraces that about herself and doesn't care what other people think. She knows what it's like to be different which is why she is a great role model for anyone who is struggling with being bullied or picked on. Her lyrics, especially in "born this way," offer positivity for everyone to embrace who they truly are. It's a source of hope for people being bullied to look up to someone who is famous because of her uniqueness and see how successful she is just by being herself.
ReplyDeleteI would envy that personality. Is there really anyone who doesn't care what others think or say about them? Or have they learned to let go of criticism and move on? Or do they hurt and hide it better than others? If there are people that really don't care about what ANYONE thinks, then they MUST have been born with something special. I wasn't born not caring what people thought of me, but I would love to learn some strategies that would help me shake things off easier.
DeleteAs we take a retrospective look at Tyler Clementi's case, it almost seems intuitive to connect Tyler's suicide to the intimate video clips that his roommate captured and later broadcast on the Internet. While I can imagine that such an invasion of privacy contributed to Clementi's suicidal ideations, the jury in this case is not attempting to draw causality between the two.
ReplyDeleteAfter reading Jacobs' "Teen Cyberbullying Investigated," it is evident that the law cannot hold a person responsible for the impending decisions that another person makes as a result of their commentary. The suspect in this case, Dahrun Ravi, could not have anticipated that his videos would result in Clementi's suicide. Therefore, the only charge carrying the potential of prison time is the bias charge. To secure a conviction, then, the prosecution is going to have to somehow unearth Ravi's intentions for capturing Clementi's intimate moments on camera. Determining intentionality is unbelievably hard to prove, so I have a sneaking suspicion that Ravi will not be held accountable for his actions.
Here's the reality -- We can continue to belabor over the tragic and untimely deaths of these young people, attempting to point fingers at the supposed culprits, or we can use their experiences to inform our pedagogy as instructors and as confidants. Several of you have mentioned in previous posts that teachers are often ill equipped to combat bullying. In fact, one of the articles suggests that bullying can actually escalate after a student confides in an adult. Shocking, I know! With this in mind, educators must EXPLICITLY instruct students on 1) appropriate peer interactions, 2) the distinction between bullying and hate crimes (often they seem to be one in the same), and 3) how to deal with the outcome of these behaviors. Easier said then done, of course...Since students cannot always foresee the consequences of their actions, it is by highlighting cases like Tyler's or sharing the voices of actual teens from the "It Gets Better Project," do we begin to illuminate these realities.
I've said it before, but I'll say it again. Education is about more than instructing our students on the intricacies of math, science, social studies, and English. Reflect back on the aims of Jeffersonian education, and the focus is on preparing our students for entry into a democratic society. As teachers, then, we need to educate our students on how to appropriately interact with one another AND how to recognize if/when their behaviors may have unexpected outcomes.
I went to the online hate site and dug a little further and played one of the cyber netiquette games aimed at 9-12 graders. I think they would find it a little childish but it could definately be used for younger children. It's interesting that it has opened up a whole other avenue for learning.
ReplyDeleteOn another note, how do you as parents/educators feel about the minor laws? The ones that state that they do not have to tell you or the Doctor does not have to tell you if they have an abortion? take drugs? I am just curious as it is a conversation that I have had with a few parents lately who were unaware.
Tina
Tina
Online games or tutorials can have a lot of good information, but I think kids aren't making the connection between these and their lives. THAT CONNECTION is what we need to make. You can teach empathy, but it won't be effective unless you can get your kids to FEEL it. I'm thinking a hands-on project or experiment connecting different groups of student's could help make a connection. Wife Swap takes a wife from one home and puts her in an extremely opposite home. Most partipants have come out of the experience feeling refreshed to be back in "their environment" but they've also been exposed to different "cultures" and have gained a respect for others that are different. It would be neat to do something like this with students- I'm not saying we pack them up and send them to a different environment for a week- but let's modify the approach to work in schools to achieve the same results.
DeleteIn my classes I teach, “Don't hate the child, Hate the behavior”. And this is how I look at bullying. Yes some kids may bully out of pure meanness, but I like to think most kids are doing it because they don’t know better or they are getting caught up in the moment. Most kids are influenced by their parents/caregivers, if they have caregivers that do not set examples, it can be difficult to change that. But being proactive with teaching our students about kindness can help. I also think that if students of different sexualities are willing to share their feelings and thoughts with others, students who are “afraid of the unknown,” can have a better understanding. My schools have LGBT groups. I would suggest if your school has one, sit in on it for a couple of times or get more involved. In my class I have a transgender who is very open about how he feels. He expresses stories, thoughts and feeling about things that were said and done to him when he was younger and how it has effected who he is today. Although many students in the class will ask him questions and he is willing to answer, I make sure it is a controlled conversation. I believe that this is helping the other students in our class understand what he is going through and that he is human just like the rest of them. And in turn they will be able to pass on this understanding to others. I have learned so much from him and am so pleased to have him in my class. Every life loss over bullying is a waste. We need to continue to be proactive and become great role models in kindness.
ReplyDeleteFrom that article, it reminds me of what I posted in one of the other blogs about being a "bystander." At our school, we recently had a fight videotaped and kids were encourging the fight. The saddest thing was watching these girls (both were best friends last year in my class) and seeing them go at it. The worst part about it was seeing kids just sitting back and letting it happen. They were laughing and backing up to them them fight more (which in fact was fueling the fire.) Eventually, a teacher came to break up the fight, but the girl who got the most punches in is now being "glorified" in the eyes of the other students! There is something truely wrong with this picture!
ReplyDeleteOur school really had a wake-up call because this is not a common behavior! We immediately got together as a school to talk about how we can stop this from happening again.
I know that cliques are something that every school has, but finding ways for kids to see that they are all the same. It's something that I think school systems are trying to figure out, but hopefully, one day we will find a solution!
Did you post it anywhere online?
ReplyDeleteYES -> It's not private!
NO -> Private!